Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Leaps and Bounds

My daughter can finally jump off of both feet! Jumping off of both feet is a huge physical developmental achievement. Now I know all of you who have boys are thinking, "my son was jumping off his feet before he was walking". Yeah well girls are different and my little girl has been working on this one for a long time. Jumping off two feet and actually getting air is seriously the last of the gross motor skills, I mean what else is there after jumping? I feel like next week she may be riding a bike, reading, or leaving for college. All of this growing up has me wanting my baby back.

Let me just announce now that I am pregnant. I think we are about 8 weeks along in this 9 month journey. We are hoping to hear the heartbeat next week when we meet up with our midwifes.

The funny thing about being pregnant is the way it makes me feel towards Marin. I feel more attached and in love with her than ever before. I believe part of these feelings are because I'm a hormonal prego. The other driving force is probably the realization that her world is going to change and there is nothing she can do about it (and I know what its like to have people make choices that have affected me, but I had no say in those choices and how they affected my life-positive or negative). As much as I know we will love this baby, and as excited as Marin thinks she is (she's very convinced that she will be nursing the baby herself), our new baby will be another wonderful human living in our house who needs attention, love, nursed, and all of those other things people want and need. All of this will be time that Marin will be splitting with the baby, not having it all to her self.

I have also realized that my automatic thoughts about the baby are still Marin-centered. For example, "What gender sibling will Marin have" not "This little baby will have a big sister" or "I wonder if we are having a girl or a boy?"

When we found out we were pregnant with Marin we were so excited, but we also went through the realization that it was the end of just us two and that we would be changing our family dynamic. We are also very excited about this baby and cannot wait to welcome him or her into our lives, and to be welcomed into his or her life. But the reality is that mid-September our little family of three is going to change to a little bit bigger family of four. This is very exciting, and yet I have seen enough people welcome a second baby into their home to know that amongst the joy of life there is still adjustment, "a good adjustment, but still an adjustment" as one of my friends kindly said.

Well for now the lady living under our apartment is getting adjusted to Marin's new jumping development, and we will look forward to embracing the new baby adjustment.

OK sorry its sideways but I don't know how to turn uploaded pictures. I'll look for a new jumping picture soon!

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