Attachment Parenting

I have not posted anything really on my love for the philosophies of Attachment Parenting. The basic idea is that families become stronger throughout generations as children are raised with the goal of building trust, respect, and affection for each other. The ultimate goal is that these children would then have the ability to build strong, lasting bonds to other humans. The most popular "attachment parent-er" is non-other than the famous pediatrician, Dr. William Sears, his wife, and now his children that are also writing about child health and attachment.

The main reason I am writing about this today is because Attachment Parenting International has a free online copy of their newsletter that is currently available here

But while I'm at it I'm going to go a head and post the 8 Principles of Attachment Parenting.
1. Prepare for Pregnancy, Childbirth and Parenting
Become emotionally, physically and mentally ready for birth, through education, support and family.
2. Feed with Love and Respect
Bring baby to breast, learn signs of hunger, and model healthy eating habits.
3. Respond with Sensitivity
Baby's are not capable of self soothing, give consistant empathy to help them learn to regulate their emotions. Build the foundation of trust from the beginning, let them know that their words (all forms of baby communication) matters to you.
4. Use Nurturing Touch
Touch meets baby's needs, skin to skin contact, baby wearing, nursing, massage, and hugs. The need for physical touch does not lessen as children age.
5. Ensure Safe Sleep Both Physically and Emotionally
Children have needs at night just as they do during the day; from night fears, hunger, loneliness to feeling too hot or cold. Responding to a child gently in the night also builds their trust and ability's of secure attachment.
6. Provide Consistent Loving Care
7. Practice Positive Discipline
Discipline that does not devalue, disrespect or belittle a child. Discipline that is supportive, loving consistent and encourages positive behavior. Discipline that helps a child develop his own internal discipline, and compassion for others. Rather than reacting to the behavior, discovering the needs that are leading to the behavior.
8. Strive for Balance in both Personal and Family Life
Create a support network, set realistic goals, put people before things, and don't be afraid to say "no". Be creative, and have fun with parenting and take time for yourself!

As you can imagine everything is built on the final one. And of course its the hardest... hmmm when was the last time I took time out for me... oh wait I've been reading Twilight all day... I guess its time for FAM!!

Book Note: Hungry Monkey

NPR has an interesting interview with author, Mathew Amster-Burton and his little monkey, Iris about his book Hungry Monkey. This book came out of Mathew's search for a good "what to feed kids" book. He found many books fell short as to what children really can eat, and actually scared readers about kids diets, eating habits and allergies.

While I'm not sure I'm on the same page with him when it comes to sugar consumption, for the most part I think he's on the right track when it comes to getting kids to develop more sophisticated palate.

You can listen to Scott Simon's interview here: NPR Hungry Monkey

On the Day You Were Born

Have I ever mentioned that I LOVE children's literature. Good literature that is. I am very particular about books I choose. Part of my book choosing decisions are shaped by a book I read a few months ago called "Honey for A Child's Heart" by Gladys Hunt. This is a great resource on how to pick out good children's stories, the importance of literature in a child's life and why the quality matters.

One of my favorite books we read to Marin is "On the Day You Were Born" by Debra Frasier. This book is about how the natural world; Artic terns, humpback whales, the Sun and Moon, and even the pulling tide share in the joy of a baby's arrival. The baby in the end turns out to be the baby you are reading the story to. I love the last page of this book which says; ""Welcome to the spinning world," the people sang, as they washed your new, tiny hands. "Welcome to the green Earth," the people sang, as they wrapped your wet, slippery body. And as they held you close they whispered into your open, curving ear, "We are so glad you've come!""

Its a wonderful book about how we are all connected, nature and humans,and how important and wonderful each aspect of that interaction can be. This book is also about the celebration of the birth of a baby. Marin loves having a book that tells her what a special day her arrival was.

Check it out from your local library some time, or give it as a baby gift.

Postpartum Recepies

I have sent a few emails to a few people lately about some postpartum "bottom" soothers. So I have decided to put this on my blog so that everyone who reads it can have the list of "bottom" soothers.

For starters let me be clear on the vocabulary. When I say "bottom" I am not referring to your rear end, tush... whatever you call it. I am referring to your bottom that is going to push the baby out. That BOTTOM!

For starters here is your shopping list:
Epsom Salt
Witch Hazel
Large maxi pads
Lavender Oil
Arnica
Tall sock
Rice (long grain slow cook)
One bottle of Champagne and one birthday cake!

Now what is all this stuff for?

Sits Baths
After you push your baby out of your bottom side and deliver the placenta, you will have heavy to light bleeding for several weeks. The first few days its called lochia and is much heaver than what you will experience the remainder of the time you have discharge. One of the most wonderful things you can do throughout this time is take sits baths. I'm not sure why they are called this, but it is. Anyways the point of this little bath is that you can have one as often as you like because its just a few inches of water, cool or warm, that you put in the tub and sit in to rinse your bottom side out and feel clean.

In the few inches of water add:
1/4 cup epsome salt
few drops of lavender oil
splash of witch hazel

none of this has to be exact measurements, but don't over do the non-water ingredients.

Ice Pads
Along with the sits baths another nice treat for your bottom is an ice pad. You can make these yourself several week before your due date and have them ready.

Fill a large bowl with water. Add 1/4 cup witch hazel and few drops of lavender oil, wisk together.

Dip the large maxi pads into the water and place into a freezer zip bag and put in freezer. (Its always nice to clean out your freezer 15 months after you give birth a find left over frozen pads and 60 ounces of breast milk, and even funnier if your husband cleans it out... "what happend to the days of having ice cream and frozen peas in the freezer?")

If you have hemroids make some with extra witch hazel. This is a great way to sooth and shrink those bad guys. (Most all over the counter hemroid wipes number one ingredient is witch hazel)

Arnica
This is a homiopathic remidy, if you are taking any other forms of medicine and are concerned with its interaction with arnica you can always ask your DR before taking this.

Arnica comes from a plant and can be found in many different forms. Its primary purpose is to aid in healing from trauma to the body. Let me just say, your vagina is going to go through trauma after you push your wonderful baby out, so just go get a bottle of it now.

Do not get the cream or gel. You cannot apply it to your bottom. You have to get the tablet form. I prefer the French brand Boiron. This is a little white tablet that goes under your tongue. There are directions on the bottle. It costs under $10 in most natural food stores.

Rice Sock
I would actually recommend making your rice sock before you have your baby. These are great during labor to heat up and put on your back, and pelvis or anywhere it really hurts as a natural ache reliever.

To make a rice sock simply buy five pounds of long grain slow cooking white rice (the quick cooking rice will burn). This can be very inexpensive. You do not need some organic costly brand as it will not be consumed. Take a long sock and pour the rice in, tie a knot in the end and you're done.

To heat; place in the microwave for about one minute. Shake well to distribute the heat and place on sore body part. I loved this on my neck as I was nursing. I was very relaxing.

Celebration Time!
As for the bubbly and birthday cake. I recommend this to most of my doula clients. When I was trying to write my birth plan before Marin was born I was having a hard time getting started (in the end I never really wrote one actually) and a good friend who was also my doula suggested that I just go home and make a birthday cake and put it in the freezer and take it with us to our birth. I made a brownie ice cream cake and while I was making the cake it got me really excited about going through birth and actually realizing it was a celebration. Birth is not something that is a medical procedure, its your child's first birthday. A day to celebrate his or her arrival.

I attended a birth back in Missouri where the siblings of the newborn came in for the cutting of the umbilical cord. They sang happy birthday, and then we brought in the cake the mother had made prior to the birth and toasted with glasses of Champagne. What a beautiful way to welcome your baby. If you are not allowed to bring the cake with you to a hospital, you can always have one waiting at home, you'll be hungry anyways.

Welcome Home Little One! We Are So Glad You Are Here!

Earth Day

Happy Earth Day everyone! I just wanted to let you all know that if you go to Oprah.com or click here at this link you can print off a coupon for a FREE Whole Foods lunch bag. Its a cute little sack made of recycled plastic sacks. Also at the same sight you can get 20 % off of SIGG resuable lunch items and TO-GO Ware! This is great news! Share it with your neighbors. Spread the word, this stuff can be expensive, but worth it in the long run because it saves money when you reuse items.

Happy Earth Day!

Bringing Up Baby, As Music Lovers Might

I know I have said this before but I really do love NPR. Yesterday on All Things Considered Bridid McCarthy did a story on music lovers chosing the music their child will listen to the very first time they come out of the womb. This is a wonderful 4 minute podcast that you will enjoy. It brought back wonderful memories of Todd and I taking our CD's right into the birth center where Marin was born and playing music for her as we all got to know each other in those first hours.

Listen Here

Enjoy

Morality, and when children form it

My husband recently found a WNYC Radio Lab podcast on the topic of morality and when people form it. He downloaded it for me, because of course its something I would be interested in. It's a really fascinating topic, and the hosts do a great job at exploring great questions about this topic.

I found this topic very interesting because I have a toddler who is clearly forming many ideas about life and the way things work. She is learning right from wrong and asking a lot of "why" questions when we tell her something is good or bad.

OK download it and listen sometime when you have laundry to fold.
Morality (Rebroadcast) here